Self-Discovery in the Wake of MLM

Reclaiming Identity with Julie Anderson

I found myself completely isolated and doubting my thoughts and feelings when I first left the MLM I was part of for many years. When Julie Anderson popped up on my Instagram feed, I almost wanted to look over my shoulder to see if anyone saw me viewing anti-MLM content. “How did she get here?” I wondered because all of my homework to detangle my suspicions had been done extremely discreetly for fear of being deemed a defector. Then I realized why this woman looked so familiar…

In April 2021 I signed up for “TikTok & Profit” through the Higdon Group, an MLM coaching group that whistleblowers are now calling a commercial cult that MLMs funnel participants into, thanks to upline referrals and social media algorithms. Julie Anderson, a former leader in Monat and Rankmakers Coach was now sharing her journey waking up from what she learned was nothing more than a manipulative scheme that had eventually consumed her whole life.

I reached out to Julie, and like a few others I had reached out to in the cult-recovery space, she responded quickly and compassionately. I would come to realize that most of us who become members of these types of groups really just wanted to help people, so the support on the outside (once I was no longer afraid to reach out) was generous. Julie was one of the people who acted as a sounding board while I figured out my exit strategy. I noticed some fascinating things interacting with Julie and others in the anti-MLM world:

1. She never told me what to do. She repeatedly reinforced the fact that my intuition can be trusted. In high control groups it is common to have our intuition reframed as “limiting beliefs” or having “a broke mindset,” so an affirming voice felt healing.

2. She knew the language, the behaviours and the belief systems I had been part of, inside out and backwards. We could finish each others sentences despite having been part of completely different companies with different niches of product lines. This reinforced that I had been put through a system—a machine that acts as if it is special and unique, which is ultimately a lie.

3. We had both taken two entire years to deconstruct and disentangle from what we were part of. I would hear more stories from other survivors from various types of coercive groups, and everyone seemed to embark on the same stages of awakening. First, just feeling low. Disembodied, disconnected and disoriented. Then a process of seeking to learn as much as possible about what we were part of, and finally, a need to make amends and reclaim our identity and purpose.

When I was able to exit and eventually come forward as a whistleblower myself, Julie was encouraging and a continued source of support. She was kind enough to invite me on her YouTube channel last week to discuss the topic of reclaiming identity. Throughout the talk, we answered questions from the audience on the live stream and had tons of belly laughs! Beware, we both love to swear and use humour as a processing tool!

Here is the loose transcript from our time together with resources hyperlinked:

3:00 - The long process of getting out

8:25 - My “Fuck You Romi” Reel; fat-shaming in MLM

11:00 - Writing enables our inner voice to become clearer

14:37 - Art therapy / drawing birds

17:00 - How meditation can be a struggle for our personalities, but creative arts enables us to “take action” while still slowing down

20:21 - How I would abruptly unfollow anyone anti-MLM, believing they were negative or low-vibration

21:37 - The “Flying Monkey” phenomenon

22:50 - The Law of Attraction and James Arthur Ray

24:00 - “Sapians” by Yuval Noah Harari

26:54 - Getting diagnosed with ADHD

27:27 - “Conspirituality” (you can’t just take thing away from people)

28:52 - Remembering my passion for psychology

30:00 - Advice for those coming out of commercial cults

33:00 - Steven Hassan’s Moonies story

35:54 - Being a “Type A” personality

37:47 - “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron

39:33 - Embracing Anger

42:16 - Real “time freedom”

1:01 - “Who/what can I trust?”

1:10 - Power dynamics in MLM / Edify = Deify

1:16 - Dual Relationships and enmeshment / no boundaries

1:20 - Working your business in pockets of time? Or always working on your business. Constantly.

1:24 & 1:38 - My “body keeps the score” moment and weird TMJ parallels

1:26 - “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle and “You're a motherfuckin’ cougar!”

1:27 - Needle felting as a therapeutic activity

1:28 - “Wintering” by Katherine May

1:29 - “The Vow” and NXIVM and “A Little Bit Culty”

1:30 - The “Conspirituality” podcast and book

1:32 - “Marauders of Hope” by Aruna Ravikumar

1:33 - “Merchants of Deception” by Eric Scheibeler

1:34 - My dad sold Kirby Vaccums door-to-door, and I recruited his business partner into my downline!

1:35 - “We’re Hun Bots!”

1:40 - How I am making money now while I stay home with my kids!

1:42 - We had no hobbies! We were “choosing our hard!”

1:49 - Making anti-MLM content and advice from Dani of the “Huns to Humans” podcast

1:56 - “Joining an MLM is like buying a ticket to last week’s lottery” - Douglas Brooks

1:57 - Anti-MLM Nichole shared “Things with higher success rates than MLMs”

1:59 - The “Secret Sister” book mini ponzi scheme on Facebook

2:00 - “Always Marco”

I hope this conversation is helpful to you! If you end up listening in, leave us a comment and tell us what stood out most for you! Kidding! We are happy to be a resource and source of support.